Chiselling Bread with an Ice Pick

Hello, my friends! It is so kind of you to open out this blog today. I need friends!! I have a story for you of my inner “yuck”. Once again Anna’s flesh pulled out the “ice pick”.

Let’s start with a Bible passage or two.

Ephesians 4:29
Holman Christian Standard Bible (HCSB)
No rotten talk should come from your mouth, but only what is good for the building up of someone in need, in order to give grace to those who hear.

2 Timothy 3:16
New Living Translation (NLT)
All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.

So here’s the story. I love Mother’s Day. I must say most days I am very happy at being a mother and my family is wonderful at helping, and even serving me. I “feel the love” so to speak. Yet, just having a day set aside to do whatever mom wants to do is so special.

Sunday, we all went to church. Tim has been working on Sunday mornings but had Mother’s day off. He sat with me and laid his head on my shoulder. He soon fell asleep. It was then that I received my very best present on Mother’s Day. I didn’t wake him. I indulged in his warm presence. I smelled his clean hair. I relived the past when he was a little boy six years old once again dozing on me in church. The present I gave myself was “the taking advantage of” the opportunity to kiss his head several times. Many of you know the struggles I have had with Tim and his rebellion. You can appreciate this gift I gave myself. He signed a card for me on Mother’s Day and he added “thank you for your patience”. Wow! It was so touching I cried.

Cory was his princely self. He was handsome, prepared for church and helpful as we headed out the door to church. He genuinely hugged me with love and said so. He was available to run an errand before lunch and never complained. I so loved his reliability and commitment to family. He signed his card “thanks for keeping me around”. Like I would EVER kick him out! It was then that I vowed to daily confirm my appreciation of him.

Now let’s talk about Bread and the Ice Pick. In other words, let’s talk Kevin, the love of my life! I had planned a wonderful steak lunch for our family after church. Everything was scheduled out, as far as what would be in oven or on stove at certain times so that everything would be done at the same time. I know my loving husband has a hard time with these things so I clearly spelled out the whats and whens. I told him this before church. Part of the plans were for Kevin to go to store and buy a newspaper, real butter and bread or rolls that would not need the oven. I promise I said this. After church and after a mission trip meeting, we finally start our schedule. I get dropped off at the house to start the dinner plans. Kevin and Cory go off to the store and return. GUESS WHAT MY LOVING HUSBAND PICKED UP FOR BREAD. You guessed it. Brown and Serve rolls…large ones that need to be baked in the OVEN! He bought these after Cory suggested the fresh French bread that didn’t need the oven. Mind you I have a small oven. I had Stouffer’s Mac and Cheese that takes forever to bake even after I thawed it. When the guys were at the store, I finished the salad prep, potatoes, drinks, and Tim set the table with china and crystal. The plan was to have Kevin come home from store grill the steaks and be eating in ten minutes. NOT! He tried to bake the rolls on the grill and then do steaks. I had Tim go buy the French bread and he was back by the time steaks finally hit the plates. It was such an ordeal.

Now for the “ice pick”. I said a few choice words…well more that a few. I was so disappointed in Kevin for his lack of listening, lack of concern for what I wanted, and for wanting me to be hurt and sad on Mother’s day. You know I read so much into this. I was sure I was going to need therapy. I called him “dumb” and other hurtful things. The ice pick just wouldn’t penetrate HIS prideful heart. I was angry and hurt at the same time.

When lunch finally came about, we sat at the table and I apologized to the boys for the big scene. We prayed and we ate a wonderful meal. I thoroughly enjoyed my buttered French bread. It could have been a rock but I would of ate every bit to prove my point.

Later that day we watched a movie as a family, I took a nap, and we played Yahtzee (a game) before bed. I had my boys to myself and a husband who continued to love on me and make my day special. Well, almost. You see the boys after the game got to laughing about my fit before lunch. They mimicked my actions and words. I felt the ice pick go right into my heart.

You see, ladies, we often know what to do and not to do. We sometimes choose good and then at times we do as I did and do what we know not to do. I believe Paul in the Bible stated this very thing. We don’t have to stay there in our sin and continue to speak in “rotten” words. We have our Bibles to “show us what is wrong in our lives.” The scriptures I noted above are truth. The truth sets us free, girlfriends.

Well, I am off to clean house. I am enjoying being home this week. I will be going back to work but this week I am putting some hours in at night. This gives me time to get back into a routine at home. I love you and please know I share because I hope if any of you struggle like I do. There is hope. There is our BIG God! You are not alone.

It’s time to go put away the ice pick and look for a paint brush. It‘s time to go color my husbands world with sweet words of affirmation.