Happy 22nd Anniversary

22 years ago I was a young wife in love with a wonderful man and the opportunity to feel like a princess.  I had a beautiful 1980's dress, complete with a hat and gauntlet gloves.  It was like a dress from the movie "Gone with the Wind".  My uncle danced with me that night and called me "Scarlet".  You know I thought I was the best thing since sliced bread.  I have wonderful memories about my wedding day, but it didn't come without some strife and emotional turmoil.

We had dated for about 2 years, but our engagement was for six months.  I lived in California during my engagement and Kevin was in Arizona where he started a new job.  I was estranged off and on with my dad for several years.  I was pleased when he asked me to attend an alcohol recovery program with him.  He checked himself into a hospital program for alcoholism.  He and I went to classes and therapy.  He was sober.  We had a nice Christmas.  Then 2 weeks before my wedding he called.  He was drunk and threatening suicide.  I of course was disappointed and angry.  I had to let him go and let him do what he will, and what I knew he wouldn't do.  I never heard from him until literally one hour before I was going to the church on the day of my wedding.  He wanted to walk me down the aisle.  I had arranged for my uncle to walk me down the aisle.  I with the reassurance from my uncle allowed my father to walk me down the aisle.  Ladies, I had a beautiful song sung while my dad walked me down the aisle.  There was not a dry eye in the church.

Through the Eyes of Love, Melissa Manchester
(Theme from Ice Castles)

Please, don't let this feeling end
It's everything I am
Everything I want to be
I can see what's mine now
Finding out what's true
Since I found you
Looking through the eyes of love
Now, I can take the time
I can see my life
As it comes up shining now
Reaching out to touch you
I can feel so much
Since I found you
Looking through the eyes of love
And now, I do believe
That even in a storm we'll find some light
Knowing you're beside me, I'm all right
Please, don't let this feeling end
It might not come again
And I want to remember
How it feels to touch you
How I feel so much
Since I found you
Looking through the eyes of love

Every wedding has it's frustrating and funny moments.  Here are some of mine. 

I am walking up the aisle with my dad.  I cannot wait until he hands me over to Kevin. The tears are rolling down my face and I want the safety and security of Kevin's hand.  I am almost there.  I am within arms reach and suddenly I cannot move.  I am pulling and leaning forward to reach Kevin.  My dad stops walking thinking I had chosen to stop.  NO please let's keep moving forward.  I couldn't.  A photographer is stepping on my long train on my dress.  It almost looked like I changed my mind.  Kevin and the minister came down the aisle toward me.  My mother got the photographer off my dress.   My dad lifted my veil, kissed me goodbye, and put the veil back down.

Kevin and I said our vows and went up the altar to light the unity candle.  The table was so pretty and the candles were glowing brightly.  Kevin gently guides me to table.  We stand side by side, pick up our own candles and lean into the table to light our unity candle.  My veil blows forward to the flame.  I have to jump back to avoid a bon fire.  Kevin and I both laughed at what was to be a serious moment.  

We make it to the reception dinner.  The guests are starving because they had to wait for our arrival.  The picture taking took over an hour.  We arrive to cheers and clapping.  The food is ready to be served. It is hot and smells wonderful.  We had Roast beef, Rigatoni, Salad, and Bread.  My aunt who is in charge of the dinner approaches me.  She asks me where are the plates.  We did not rent glass plates, because I had purchased acrylic red plates for our guests. My maid of honor had them stored in her apartment.  She had brought all the wedding supplies to the lodge but apparently forgot the plates.  Her apartment was an hour drive round trip.  Poor starving guests.  It was supper time.  My cousin had to run to the closest grocery store and buy up all the Chinet plates available.  The guests were eating within 30 minutes.  Yahoo!

We did not serve alcohol.  We did have a no host bar for guests should they inbibe.  Guests brought champagne.  My late brother inlaw brought champagne for our wedding toast.  Kevin and I had guests fill our glasses through out the night.  Needless to say I was not thirsty that night.  Unfortunately, I was exhausted and yes, tipsy to say the least.  When Kevin and I decided to leave for the night, still in my wedding dress, we walked around the room and handed out silk tulips with birdseed in it.  Kevin, was behind me.  I had my long train draped over my arm, but apparently not all of it.  My new of husband of about 6 hours stepped on my train and I heard a rip.  He tore my dress at the waist.  I started crying and hated that he stepped on the princess' gown.  I was a drunk princess but I was still in the limelight and I deserved to look good, no matter if I couldn't talk good, and the room was spinning.  My mother and mother in law quickly took me to the kitchen.  They each took a foot in their hands and took off my shoes and started massaging my feet.  These days I have seen brides in barefeet, in flip flops and ballerina slippers. I of course was not so pioneering.  I wore sharply pointed, lipstick heeled, formal shoes.  They were beautiful...white satin with a swirl of rhinestones.  They were TORTURE.  However the real kicker was my Mother in Law found a penny wedged and imprinted in the bottom of my foot.   The father had put a penny in my shoe for good luck.  It was supposed to be just for a picture taking opportunity.  It  was never taken out.  I had walked on it for hours!!! Ouch.  It made me grouchy.  It wasn't long before my family sent me onto my honeymoon with a bizillion pounds of birdseed being thrown at us.  It made me grouchy too!  It hurt.  

My wedding night ended with me in the shower.  When I took off my wedding dress, five pounds of seed fell to the floor.  I was near ready to pass out of exhaustion as well of the bubbly.  Kevin had to put me in the bath tub to revive me.  The man was going to have a wedding night.  Enough of that.

It's 22 years later and the craziness of the day is still fresh.  We had so much fun that day.  We were surrounded with loved ones.  Friends and family had traveled from all over the country literally to celebrate with us.  Today we will celebrate with laughter and a lightness that comes with being in a well seasoned and comfortable marriage.  It is 12:30am now. It is officially my anniversary.  I guess I should go to bed.  I look forward to morning and starting a wonderful day. No pennies, no high heeled shoes, and no champagne... just a kiss and maybe a dance.

Our Wedding Dance Song:

Anne Murray
"MY LIFE'S A DANCE"

The world was just a ball rolling around the sun
a million miles away from any other one
my life was just a dance where sometimes the music played
I held it in my hands 'til only the melody remained

And you were just a wish under a paper moon
a whisper on my lips that never could come true
but here you are with me and I'm like a child again
you set this prisoner free just when I thought I'd reached the end

Now when I look into your eyes I see
you were given as a gift to me
I know that you and I were meant to be together
if there's a Heaven shining up above
I wanna thank the one who let your love come shining through
'cause now my life's a dance I dance with you

Now I understand just what I'm living for
I can't remember how I ever did before
my heart is full of life I never knew was there
'cause through the light of love I see the world we're meant to share


Thank you for allowing me to share as I reflect on my start with the man I truly love.
You can celebrate with me by giving your significant other a great big hug.
Find a memory to revive those butterflies in your tummy! acf