My Life without God

Girlfriends, I am a mess! A can't get it together mess! Yesterday I was cleaning up my kitchen, anticipating my sweet day on the sofa after a long hot bath. Then bang! The phone rings and my friend wants to come over and use the computer before she goes to work. I said yes. No problem she has to leave for work by 10:30-11:00. Still lots of time for "me"! So I am cleaning up in the kitchen and I notice I am freezing. I should be sweating. I always do when we I am running around cleaning. Well, I go to the thermostat and it says 58 degrees. I go to the gas logs and the fireplace is completely dark. We ran out of gas for heat. So I have to scratch the bath. A quick shower would warm me up and I will jump back in bed to stay warm. I can read in bed and still feel pampered. Kevin said to do this and he would take us out to supper. So I gather my things after the shower and head to the bedroom. It hits! GUILT. We don't need to buy supper out. In fact, if I got up and started moving around, I might feel warmer than staying in bed. So I get up and cook, and cook, and cook. I made homemade enchilada sauce for an enchilada casserole, beans, and rice. I peel a bizillion apples that were in the pantry waiting to go bad. I make an apple crisp dessert and freeze the rest of the apple slices. I was cleaning up all the while and doing laundry. I suddenly wasn't that cold with the moving around and the oven on. I set the table and we are all eating by 4:30pm. We had company later that evening for an hour. I told them to keep their coats on. How embarrassing! They were good sports and said our house felt warm. Oh sure! Such politeness! I was tucked in bed after watching American Idol with the boys. We were all piled up high with blankets. It was like camping!

Later this morning the gas was delivered. I woke up freezing and didn't want to get out of bed other than to take care of bathroom needs. So I didn't. I asked kevin if he could take care of breakfast. I told him how to make Tim's breakfast smoothie, and what I had planned to make for Cory. He was precious and did so. I should of felt guilty and got up. I didn't. I decided I would read and do my blog from bed on the old lap top. Kev brought me a bagel and cream cheese on a breakfast tray and delivered me the lap top. How sweet! I ate. Put aside the lap top and tried to sleep. I got a call every hour on the hour and texts. You think I might of got up. It was almost noon before I get up. I have checked my email and now I am blogging. So you ask why tell us? Well, I am always looking for a lesson. It just came as I am writing. Did you notice that I never mentioned a devotional or prayer time today or yesterday? I just was determined to live life my way I guess. These past two days. Every once in a while I do this. It's not that I turn my back on God but I don't give Him place, respect, or time. Though every once in awhile I do this, it is every time with a consequence. He don't punish me per se, but He always shows me that if I let Him guide my steps and show me His will for the day there will be peace and a blessing in my day. If I don't, then things like now happen. Kevin never and I mean never takes a 2 hour lunch. He just came in and said what are we going to do about lunch? I have 2 hours. He is off to lunch alone. Ladies, here I lay, unshowered, undressed, my hair is sticking up so high it won't fit in the car, and I am hungry. I apologized to him and said no problem and left! How could I do that to the man who fed me breakfast in bed. I did it because I was lazy and selfish. I didn't get to indulge yesterday and I was hoping to recoup today. Obviously, God would of wanted me to be prepared for Kevin's invitation to lunch.

So there you have it. I am a mess. I am a sad excuse of a wife and I know it. I have learned a lesson. Get up and get ready because God has something planned for your day and you won't know it until you ask Him. I am going to sign off now. I will shower before he gets home and hopefully recoup some snuggle and talk time.

Have a great second half of a day, and great weekend. I hope to post again soon if not we will meet up again on Monday! Love ya, acf